"Yeah," Mike huffs with a grimace. "How am I doing?" He's pretty sure that he's failed completely at helping, but at least Will knows that was what he was trying to do, before he made everything worse.
"I don't know if you are over sensitive," Mike says, crossing his arms and looking down at his feet. "It's hard not to be sensitive when everywhere you look there's a reminder of what we've been through." It's part of why most of them got out of Hawkins as fast and as far as they could. But it's different for Will, he knows that. There's so much more associated with the town that he saved but still rejects him.
"No," Mike says firmly, his eyes bright with tears. Finally, he allows himself to reach out and put a hand on Will's arm. "Will, you're my best friend. I'm sorry I didn't call. I guess, I've been embarrassed about how much I'm not doing. Every time I think about it, I picture you out with your friends and coming home to an awkward answering machine message from your childhood friend that you don't need any more." His voice cracks at the end and the tears spill over and Mike wipes them away in frustration.
"I don't know how I fit or where I belong any more and that's not your fault. Home doesn't feel like home and school is..." He lets out a low breath. "It's not what I thought it would be." He hasn't actually said it out loud, outside of his head and now that he's managed to put it into words he thinks it sounds stupid. It's nothing compared to fighting One or surviving the last few years. It had felt like he was drowning in the bigness of it inside his head, but outside of it, it seems so small. "It's stupid, I know."
"Maybe i deserve to be hurt," he says, blinking away tears. "I know I hurt you. And I know it's not ever going to go back to the way it was because of what I did, but I don't want to lose you. I can't." He pulls his hand back to wipe at his eyes again. "Unless you want me to. I don't want to keep hurting you just because I don't know what to do without you."
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Date: 2024-04-10 09:53 am (UTC)"I don't know if you are over sensitive," Mike says, crossing his arms and looking down at his feet. "It's hard not to be sensitive when everywhere you look there's a reminder of what we've been through." It's part of why most of them got out of Hawkins as fast and as far as they could. But it's different for Will, he knows that. There's so much more associated with the town that he saved but still rejects him.
"No," Mike says firmly, his eyes bright with tears. Finally, he allows himself to reach out and put a hand on Will's arm. "Will, you're my best friend. I'm sorry I didn't call. I guess, I've been embarrassed about how much I'm not doing. Every time I think about it, I picture you out with your friends and coming home to an awkward answering machine message from your childhood friend that you don't need any more." His voice cracks at the end and the tears spill over and Mike wipes them away in frustration.
"I don't know how I fit or where I belong any more and that's not your fault. Home doesn't feel like home and school is..." He lets out a low breath. "It's not what I thought it would be." He hasn't actually said it out loud, outside of his head and now that he's managed to put it into words he thinks it sounds stupid. It's nothing compared to fighting One or surviving the last few years. It had felt like he was drowning in the bigness of it inside his head, but outside of it, it seems so small. "It's stupid, I know."
"Maybe i deserve to be hurt," he says, blinking away tears. "I know I hurt you. And I know it's not ever going to go back to the way it was because of what I did, but I don't want to lose you. I can't." He pulls his hand back to wipe at his eyes again. "Unless you want me to. I don't want to keep hurting you just because I don't know what to do without you."