It doesn’t work like Will intended, Mike doesn’t reject him, he doesn’t feel any better, just terrified.
It’s all falling apart and Will doesn’t want to hope, doesn’t want to hang everything on this being any different than last time and he knows what will happen if he accepts the invitation to go inside. The problem is that he wants to. They go inside, they kiss more, Will allows himself to be touched, lets himself give Mike the thing his actual boyfriend wants from him, god he has a boyfriend and he’s going to break someone else’s heart, he’s so selfish. And then what? What happens after that? They live 400 miles apart. They can barely maintain a friendship at that distance.
“If I come in…” Will hates himself. He hates himself for trying to save them by breaking them. “We do what?” He doesn’t want to be the sensible one, he hates being the sensible one. “And then what? Can you promise me you’re going to give us a shot this time? That you won’t change your mind in the cold light of morning, can you swear you won’t do that this time?”
Tell me it’ll be different, please, please tell me you’ll try. But Mike jumped away like he’d been burned and Will knows it’s different in Hawkins, that they can’t tell Mikes parents, that it’s a massive risk, it’s just a case of whether Mike believes that they can do this somewhere else. Whether Mike thinks he’s worth it or not. Will secretly doesn’t honestly believe that he is.
He feels like he’s cocked a loaded gun to his own heart. He waits for Mike to pull the trigger.
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It’s all falling apart and Will doesn’t want to hope, doesn’t want to hang everything on this being any different than last time and he knows what will happen if he accepts the invitation to go inside. The problem is that he wants to. They go inside, they kiss more, Will allows himself to be touched, lets himself give Mike the thing his actual boyfriend wants from him, god he has a boyfriend and he’s going to break someone else’s heart, he’s so selfish. And then what? What happens after that? They live 400 miles apart. They can barely maintain a friendship at that distance.
“If I come in…” Will hates himself. He hates himself for trying to save them by breaking them. “We do what?” He doesn’t want to be the sensible one, he hates being the sensible one. “And then what? Can you promise me you’re going to give us a shot this time? That you won’t change your mind in the cold light of morning, can you swear you won’t do that this time?”
Tell me it’ll be different, please, please tell me you’ll try. But Mike jumped away like he’d been burned and Will knows it’s different in Hawkins, that they can’t tell Mikes parents, that it’s a massive risk, it’s just a case of whether Mike believes that they can do this somewhere else. Whether Mike thinks he’s worth it or not. Will secretly doesn’t honestly believe that he is.
He feels like he’s cocked a loaded gun to his own heart. He waits for Mike to pull the trigger.